Supporting Your Student on a Tough Night

  1. STRUGGLES

  2. Common unexpected behaviors

  3. Work Refusal

  4. Wandering away from tutor/s

  5. Shut down/not talking/emotional

  6. Physical and/or verbal aggression toward others

  7. Escalating tiers of behavior

  8. Do you know what signals that your student is escalating?

  9. Behaviors may build and intensify with time and frequency

  10. CONTRIBUTORS to UNEXPECTED BEHAVIORS

  11. Non-preferred tasks

  12. Frustration

  13. Lack of choices/control

  14. Unclear expectations

  15. Embarrassment

  16. Academic challenges

  17. Physical factors and outside concerns

  18. Hunger, lack of sleep, concerns at home

  19. What happened before or is anticipated after tutoring

  20. PERSPECTIVE and EXPERIENCE

  21. TRIGGERS paired with perspective and experience can significantly impact the outcome of a situation

  22. Personal tolerances vary (personal space, volume, patience, etc.)

  23. Your student’s behavior is RARELY a reflection of you or their feelings about you

  24. Refrain from emotional responses- NEVER GET PHYSICAL

  25. Our policies strictly prohibit this

  26. It breaks trust immediately

  27. PP needs to be a SAFE place for our students

  28. Don’t take comments and behaviors personally

  29. Avoid threats and pleading

  30. NEED HELP? We are here!

  31. Don’t wait- ask PP staff for help- Bring us in before you’re at your max

  32. Use the shared staff line 484-378-0746

  33. TEXT US for discreet support

  34. CALL US in an emergency

  35. TURN THE TIDE

  36. Power struggles: waste time, disrupt learning, add stress, and undermine relationships

  37. What can you do instead? Consider the long-term message vs. a momentary win

  38. Pray with/over your student

  39. Assume a non-threatening position/tone/body language

  40. Share your experiences: Be realistic, be authentic, be vulnerable

  41. Pivot- it is okay to change your plan and do things differently

  42. ALWAYS GIVE THE STUDENT AN OUT. (What could that look like? Distraction, choice, “stick a pin in it,” etc.).

  43. Be aware of their needs/beliefs in this moment

  44. Can you help them save face around peers?

  45. Remind your student you are on their side/team. Don’t assume they already know or believe this.

  46. I want to help you

  47. Tell me what you need

  48. RESET- Approach the situation in humility and apologize for frustrating/hurting/upsetting your student.

  49. This is an unexpected approach

  50. This often disarms the student and opens dialog

  51. Listen, don’t push or criticize


6. YOU ARE EQUIPPED!

  1. Adults have more experience, more coping skills, and fire tested strategies when it comes to working through approaching struggles

  2. Keep in mind what seems logical to you may feel foreign to your student

  3. Your student may be shocked that your idea/recommendation could work, because without prior experience our brains don’t recognize the reward opportunity.

  4. God has allowed you to have this very moment with this student for a reason. Pray for God to prepare your heart and equip you in those difficult moments.

  5. Start fresh each week. Extend grace and understanding to your student.

  6. Speak life into the student you work with, especially on the most difficult nights! This is a gift of grace Satan does not want our students to receive.

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